"The Four Loves"

"The Four Loves" by C.S.Lewis is an excellent book which I almost entirely agree with.

"EROS" is one of the "four loves" and ideally should be combined with at least one of the other loves.

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I don't mind admitting

I don't mind admitting that I have used prostitutes all my adult life.

One simple reason for this is that

WOMEN HAVE REJECTED ME ALL MY LIFE

and I have never been married.

Maybe the women concerned were right to reject me at the time and they certainly had the right to reject me; but before people condemn me for using prostitutes, I would like them to bear this reality in mind.

If I had not been constantly rejected, I would not have used prostitutes.

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Neither should the fact that I have used prostitutes all my adult life imply that men do not need and desire LOVING RELATIONSHIPS WITH WOMEN.

On the contrary, this is a basic need and a desire in me that has never been met, and this has caused me considerable pain.

So women - or other men for that matter - would be DOUBLY WRONG if they ASSUME from cases like mine that men, i), just want sex and, ii), don't want to give and receive love and affection in a relationship nor that iii) men don't love women or need love from women.

I wouldn't want people to draw from my life the wrong lessons.

Things go wrong in life. We can try and prevent them from going wrong. But they do go wrong.

But we must draw the right lessons.

In fact I needed and need a WIFE. I was never encouraged to believe that this was the right approach to my love life - whereas it was.

I never got a wife and maybe never will.

It is ultimately my own fault that things worked out like this, but that doesn't change the basic point I am making.

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I observe that nowadays women - mainly thanks to feminism - don't always see being a loving wife as a part of what a woman should be any more.

Also. men can be encouraged by our sexist society to believe that their nature is not loving. Of course their nature is LOVING.

You could say I wasted my life - but I in no way intended to do so.
It was utter stupidity and carelessness that led to me "wasting my life" in some respects.
No life is wasted anyway.

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My belief is that prostitution should be allowed for on LIBERTARIAN grounds.

If I personally could go back in time to the age of 19 I would simply have got married as people did for many generations before me. In which case I would never have visited prostitutes, nor wanted to.

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To clear up an apparent contradiction - women rejected me but it was my fault because I foolishly caused them to do so.

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Sex is comparable to eating.

June 2018.

"Eating and copulation have always been of interest to people and are likely to remain so. Each of these behaviours satisfies a basic biological need - eating, the survival of the individual; copulation, the survival of the species. Each may be a rich source of pleasure through gratification of desire - or a rich source of pain, for many reasons....." (Thomas Szasz, 1980)

Andy Warhol said that "sex is the biggest nothing of all time".
If eating and sex are comparable - which of course they are - then we could also conceivably add to his opinion with the following one: "food is the biggest nothing of all time as well."

Andy Warhol was supposedly "gay". Perhaps we can assume that if sex is nothing, then so-called "homosexuality" is double nothing.

Andy Warhol's quote would perhaps help to make the point that sex is entirely a biological function, and that all of its manifestations in human culture are based on this biological basis. In this sense it is a limited entity, if not exactly a "nothing".

Reproduction - like nutrition - is a basic function of biological life. But whilst sex is a basic drive and probably a basic need, it is sometimes possible to do without it, particularly in middle age and later life. In this sense it is not like food which is a lifelong absolute necessity. Sex is not necessarily a lifelong necessity.

But it is very, very rare and unusual - not to mention very difficult - for humans who are members of either sex to maintain a lifelong and complete celibacy and abstention from sexual activity.

That last point is the reason why I am not changing the name of this blog, which I first put up here a few years ago.

This was in order to present an opinion which I think is important for humanity to express, and to counteract the lies of certain religious beliefs.

Being Single Is A Good Idea

What I am seeking to counter here with this blog is the belief that young people are capable of long-term and total abstinence from all sexual activity. This is more or less a lie that has often been told by religions.

Middle aged and elderly people I think are probably more capable of some form of celibacy  generally speaking.

What I also want to say is that being single and not having kids are both excellent, sensible and more importantly totally feasible options in modern life.

Even given that life-long celibacy is not really possible, I think that life-long singleness and abstinence from having children is very possible and a good idea, for various reasons.
The decision not to have children is certainly good for the planet.

There is nothing wrong with being single, and, more importantly, there absolutely is no basic need - whether psychological or sexual - for humans of either sex to be in a sexual or romantic or close relationship or partnership with a member of the opposite sex. Or even with a member of the same sex - though in this case I personally don't think a sexual relationship is possible strictly speaking.

It is simply not true that members of either sex require a partner of the opposite sex, or of the same sex.

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I saw a young woman with a T-shirt saying "No Boyfriend, No Problem" and I thought, "I totally respect that view and approve of it."

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As a Green, I think that it is a good thing for some people to have no or less children since having a concern about population growth is a part of being Green. This option is perfectly feasible and to be encouraged.

Legalizing Prostitution: A Step Towards Freedom

Leglising Prostitution: A Step Towards Freedom. :

http://www.szasz.com/undergraduate/Smith.html

Legalising Prostitution: A Step Towards Freedom

The state has no right to intervene in ANY consensual sex act.
No consensual sex act should be illegal.

I am against all forms of coercion and slavery, but in favour of free choice.

SURESH GUNDAPPA on Celibacy.

"Celibacy is one of the most unnatural things. It has destroyed so many human beings — millions — Catholic monks, Hindu monks, Buddhist monks, Jaina monks, nuns.
For centuries they have been teaching celibacy; and the most amazing thing is, even in the twentieth century, not a single medical expert, physiologist, has stood up and said that celibacy is impossible, that in the very nature of things, it cannot happen."

SURESH GUNDAPPA.


More of this piece of teaching is very much worth repeating here:

To impose celibacy means to pervert the sexual energy of man.

It is celibacy that has created homosexuality.

It is celibacy that has created sodomy. Perhaps you don’t understand the word “sodomy”; it is "making love" to animals.

Celibacy is as natural as somebody taking a vow that he will not allow his hair to grow.
What are you going to do? Is it within your hands?

Never enforce any celibacy on yourself.

Sex is not sin; repression is a sin.

Sex is very natural.....

You have not done anything to have it, it is inborn, it is part of your being.
Don’t condemn it, don’t judge it, don’t fear it, don’t fight with it.


SURESH GUNDAPPA.

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The extract above rightly refers to the fact that the nigh on impossible (not to mention unnecessary) feat of being totally celibate has destroyed millions of human beings.

Christianity at some point and for some reason that no longer really matters - has taken on board one big fat mistake - a belief in the relevance and possibility of celibacy.

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Another thing we owe to Thomas Szasz is that as a medical doctor and hence a kind of physiologist - he is one of the few amongst them to come quite close to pointing out the truth that celibacy is nearly impossible.

"Celibacy is as least as abnormal as homosexuality" Thomas Szasz.

One of the few authoritative figures in history to say so.

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"Priests without wives"

"The Gregorian reformers said that priests should not get married, as Catholics still say today........
FOR CENTURIES, most priests had had wives and children and many were themselves sons of priests.............

When one "reforming" Archbishop held a meeting of his clergy and told them to give up their wives, he was answered by a hail of stones. [IN ENGLAND!]

By 1300 it was unusual to find to find a married priest in England, Wales, Scotland and the part of Ireland ruled by the English.

Only in Irish Ireland were many of the clergy still family men."



Chapter 10  - "A New Church and Society"
P.106  - "THE YOUNG OXFORD HISTORY OF BRITAIN AND IRELAND."

Poignant that only a children's history book points out quite so plainly the simple truth.

And AN ASTOUNDING IRONY OF HISTORY given the sad situation now - where Ireland in its BENIGHTED IGNORANCE of its own history suffers kiddyfiddling priests!

Ireland that was not under English rule at this time - 1300 - was under the influence still of pre-Austininian Romano-Celtic Christianity as much as Latin Christianity.

Compulsory Clerical Celibacy was a teaching of NEITHER FORM ANYWAY!
This teaching came SADLY and erroneously to be ENFORCED around the year 1300 in the British Isles and all across Western Europe.


In honour of Dermott Morgan (R.I.P.)

Clerical CELIBACY is NOT A CHRISTIAN TEACHING.


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The "part of Ireland ruled by the English" referred to above was in that Medieval Period - unlike now - the eastern central part around Dublin.

The Mission of Augustine to Canterbury was sent by Pope St. Gregory I the Great.
It needs to be said that this Pope - who contributed importantly to preventing
the "Dark Ages" from becoming the "Completely Pitch Black" Ages - did encourage celibacy for priests.
So the mission of AUGUSTINUS - the First Archbishop of Canterbury - to Canterbury in 595 A.D. was highly likely to have been far more celibacy-minded than the Celtic Romano-British Christianity that had preceded it in Britain.


Celibacy was seen perhaps as a mark of more restrained and hence more civilized life during the Barbarian incursions. 
Also it symbolized the NON-ATTACHMENT to the world and worldly things that is a part of Christianity.
In this sense - that you do not need anything but God - Christianity is of course sympathetic to celibacy.
It needs to be said that at this time CELIBACY was predominantly VOLUNTARY.


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